My name is Supersecret Agent Cook, and I’m the Chief Interplanetary Communicator for BITE (Bureau for Intelligent Transgalactic Eating).
We at BITE have been aware of life on Planet DooF for some time now, but the powerful radiodynamic force field surrounding DooF’s atmosphere made it impossible for us to send you any messages. Then, today, our Gastrogalactoscope intercepted your solarship log!
I can see from your log that you’re wondering about those mysterious noodles — and that Commander Pollo believes that finding out about them is important enough for a transgalactic expedition.
Well, he’s right: they are a big deal!
Here’s why: Noodles are a type of substance that people on Earth call “food,” which we use in many of the same ways DooF inhabitants use Gloop. Like Gloop, food gives us energy and helps our bodies grow and stay strong. Unlike Gloop, though, food comes in lots of amazing forms and flavors. (In fact, once you taste some great food, you’ll understand why it’s worth traveling a thousand or even a million galactic light orbits for it.)
To be super-simple, noodles are a special kind of food that we call carbohydrates (say it: car-bo-hi-drates). Besides being long and slippery and really fun to eat, noodles give us lots of energy so we can run and jump and go from place to place (including outer space!).
Where did the noodles come from? BITE wanted to make sure that everyone in the universe had the chance to fuel up on some healthy Earth food, so we blasted a million packets of noodles into the cosmos — and you, Commander Pollo, actually found one. Nice catch!
The fact that it had the word “pollo” on it was purely an accident. Kind of a funny story, actually. You see, food can be made from lots of different things. We call them ingredients (in-gree-dee-ants) and one of the ingredients in the noodles we sent is “chicken” (I’ll get to that later). Thing is, since we weren’t sure how people talked on other planets, we labeled the noodles in different Earth languages. In Spanish and Italian, which are two other Earth languages, chicken is called “pollo.” So that’s how your commander’s name ended up on the package. No, that doesn’t mean we think you’re a chicken, Commander!
Well, I hope this begins to answer some of your questions. I’ll bet you’ll have more, so please feel free to contact me using your solarship log.
In the meantime: welcome to Planet Earth!
P.S. For more fun food stuff, click here.
