Elementary Analysis Tracking (EAT) Noodles

Solarship Log: DSS Gastronomy
Crew Member: Y
DooF Date: Yraunaj 81, 0102
Earth Date: January 18, 2010

Okay Lt. Trippe, you go bang up our velocitator and try to be a famous time-travel hero. I’ve got more important things to do.

Like what? Like noodles — and when we can EAT them!

Dad’s still got the package of noodles locked up in our astroparticle-analysis tank, but so far we’re not getting any readings. Of course, Lt. Trippe thinks it’s because I didn’t program it right, but that’s just typical Trippey obnoxiousness.

I’m pretty sure the reason we can’t analyze the noodles is because we don’t have any data to base it on. The only settings I have are Gloop-o-Licious ones, which are totally wrong for the stuff humans call food.

I’ve been doing some cyberspace research, which seems to indicate that the only way to really understand food is to eat it. In fact, the way some humans write about food, you’d think it was magic.

For example, this one Earth guy named Anthelme Brillat Savarin (wow, I thought DooFians had funny names!) wrote this a long time ago:

“The discovery of a new dish does more for human happiness than the discovery of a new star.”

How mega-galactic is that?!! FOOD is more important than a STAR?

If this is even sort-of true, I think we should forget analyzing the noodles and just eat them right away! I know Dad’s a bit worried about this whole eating thing, but sometimes grownups really need to just listen to their kids.

And if he won’t? Well, I have a plan — and it all depends on Agent Cook. In fact, I’m going to send her a supersecret message right now!

DooF

Elementary Analysis Tracking (EAT) Noodles

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